Two of my buddies are huge fanboys of Sura (or her boobs, I'm not sure which). When I finished watching the episode with Sura's tragic demise last week (Delicate Things), I immediately grabbed my BlackBerry and texted them: "DID YOU WATCH?" to which I got replies: "I AM QUITTING THE SHOW!" Okay, I guess they are more fanboys of her boobtastic bosoms. Come on, you should know that death on television doesn't mean you won't ever see her ever again, well that, and the fact that I've checked Sura's IMDb page where it says she's gonna have 2 more episodes coming around. Even so, her return in Great And Unfortunate Things is no joyous event for it is a profoundly sad, sad episode.

(Ahead lies spoilers of Episode 7: Great And Unfortunate Things! You have been warned)

The very first scene in Great And Unfortunate Things is of Spartacus and Sura humping like bunnies. I laughed and thought, "The boys are gonna love this." ...until I realized that this is the beginning of what was to become the epic tragic love of Spartacus and Sura. And I felt... sad. It was even quite funny, as Spartacus had to admit that he doesn't even know the name of this woman he just bedded. Such a typical booboo of the local playboy, or so we were informed of his past life as a young man in Thrace. As they exchange more flirty banters about how Sura was led into his bed by the Gods, the skeptical Spartacus asked what else did these so-called Gods of hers see about his future? Her reply:

Sura:
"...you will never love another woman."

In different circumstances, I'd say that was HOT. But in this case, that last line just broke my heart. Especially when the scene that follows dumps us back into the tragic present time where Sura is dead and Spartacus is a broken man mourning for the loss of his one true love. Sura's funeral wouldn't have been this sad if it wasn't for the melancholic chops of Andy Whitfield, whom every casting director should go straight to look for when casting a sad, brooding tortured hero.

Then comes that sneaky Batiatus to offer his fake condolences, full of remorse as he takes responsibility for something he actually did do, but came off as didn't. Ah, so reverse psychology was invented here in the House of Batiatus! Strange how usually instinctive Spartacus didn't even smell the rat in the room with him. I guess being blinded by grief could do that to you, and fuel certain unchanneled rage to the most convenient target instead: Legatus Glaber. After this, there are two things I'll be looking forward to the most in this show: 1. the day Spartacus reunites with his good friend Glaber, and 2. the day Spartacus finds out that Batiatus actually played a hand in Sura's death. TWIST!

Next sad person: Pietros. The abandoned boytoy of Barca is now defenseless against other twinkie predators. What now, there's more than one openly gay gladiators? Shocking! Poor poor Pietros. First he had to deal with abandonment issues, and now he's faced with sexual abuse. Somehow, Spartacus was the only one in the entire ignorant ludus who actually took notice of Pietros' well-being, and I was all excited (in a non-slashy way!) that perhaps these two unlikely people who have lost their loved ones could find solace in each other and form some sort of a friendship. ...EXCEPT LATER, PIETROS KILLED HIMSELF.

WHY, SHOW? WHY?

Isn't it enough already that you killed Barca AND Sura? But now you have to take Pietros too? Yes, go on, rip my heart out, tear it to shreds, stomp it on the dusty ground and then set it on fire!

Crixus is finally awake, and he is still no lover of Spartacus. Worse even, after he finds out that Spartacus had gone bazonkas on Naeus for what happened to Pietros, and threw Naeus off the damn cliff! Holy cow! Crixus condemns Spartacus for killing a "brother" for a worthless slave, which brings us back to square one on the path to The Simple Life starring Spartacus & Crixus. Since we all know that these two are going to be co-leaders in the slave revolt, seeing how they turn buddies is something I can't wait to see.

Despite that these gladiators often seem like they employ the "every man for himself" philosophy, the fact that Doctore and Crixus smell something fishy and took a lot of concern in Barca's sudden disappearance tells us that these men do indeed share a certain bond of brotherhood. Something that Spartacus has to work hard on to be a part of. I think the revelation of Barca's death will play a very huge part as a trigger to the revolt, as it will compromise Batiatus' image in the eyes of his gladiators. It will affect their loyalty greatly. Die a horrible death in the arena: VERY OK. Die murdered by your Dominus: NOT COOL.

And the most tragic thing about this episode is THAT HORRENDOUS ROMAN ATTIRE THEY MADE SPARTACUS WEAR IN THE ARENA.

Seriously, what the hell was he wearing!? Of course he won that bloodbath deathmatch against 6 savage Thracians, they probably couldn't take him seriously enough in that abomination called an armor! Okay, jokes aside, it is an epic moment in the arena where Spartacus donned that hideous Roman attire, against all his Thracian principles; tested the Gods, and was given a sign that the Gods really do have special plans for him; slayed 6 of his own countrymen, and spared no mercy to the last one, putting to rest the last remaining drop of Thracian essence left in him. He hit the reset button, letting go of the past that he so clings dearly to all this time. The man before he became Spartacus died with his Sura, and he now fully embraced his rebirth:

"I... AM...
SPARTACUS!"

Am I the only one who is still curious over Spartacus' Thracian name? After dangling the almost-mentions several times already, Starz better reveal it to us at some point, or it's just plain cruel.

We're past the halfway mark of Season 1 now. 6 more episodes to go. 6 more EPIC episodes. Go, Spartacus!